If you’ve been trying to win back an ex boyfriend or girlfriend, that first phone call or text will often come when you least expect it. Just when you’ve given up hope…just like you’ve written your ex off completely…that’s when the initial communication hits you like a ton of bricks. “OMG my ex just left me a message!”
Weeks ago, you would have been dying from such contact with your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend. You were practically sitting home alone, waiting for exactly this kind of contact. And you know what? That is precisely why it never came. You were giving off needy and desperate vibes, and your ex knew it. He or she had no interest in accepting you because you had no interest in yourself.
But now, after all this time, you’ve finally started to let go. You have stopped thinking about your ex every minute of every day. You started new projects, took up old hobbies, met other people you enjoy hanging out with. Maybe you worked on yourself physically: going to the gym, buying new clothes, looking and feeling better because you’ve been exercising a lot. Maybe you even started dating again, or at least hanging out with other people and enjoying yourself socially. And just when it seems like there’s a light at the end of the tunnel…
…CLOUT! Your ex girlfriend or boyfriend calls you. Or she sends you an email. Or send him a friendly little text message. “Hey, how are things? What are you doing?” uh oh.
So what should I do? Do you take the opportunity to get back together with your ex again? Or you go slow…you don’t respond right away…maybe you let your ex wait a day or two to hear from you, allowing him to to them the sweatshirt has changed. What is the best approach to keep your ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend interested? And what is the one that re-identifies you as that needy and desperate person?
I think you already know the answer. And the reason you know that answer is because getting an ex girlfriend or boyfriend back is less about what you do and more about what you do. WHOSE do. As soon as you don’t need your ex again, that’s exactly when you’ll get them back.
How the hell does it work like that? How does your ex know? Is there any possible way for them to realize you’re over them, when you haven’t even talked to them in several weeks or months?
The answer to that question is a resounding Yes. Your ex knows you’re not desperate, because you haven’t called her. Your ex knows you’re not sitting around waiting, because you haven’t sent him an email. Maybe one of your ex’s friends saw you laughing and having fun… or maybe your ex (or herself) found out that you’re not depressed anymore. This, in turn, did to them nervous, because suddenly it seemed very possible that they would lose you.
But why would your ex care about losing you? After all, he or she broke up with you in the first place, right?
While that statement may be true, it doesn’t mean that your ex boyfriend or girlfriend was ready to lose you. suddenly. Breaking up with someone in today’s world is so much easier than it used to be… you can still see, hear from, talk to, email, text and Facebook someone long, long after you’ve stopped dating . Maintaining this kind of connection allows her ex to slowly walk away from your relationship, instead of ripping off the Band-Aid all at once. Knowing where you are and what you’re doing is like a nice, fat, juicy safety net, which they can use in case they decide to change their minds. But when do you get that net out from under them? Your ex is suddenly terrified of falling.
So what should you do when your ex contacts you? Take it easy. Be nice, be cool, and most of all, be confident. Let your ex know it’s good to hear from him, but don’t act on it. also enthusiastic. Let them tell you why they called and, whenever possible, let her ex do most of the talking. Chances are your ex-boyfriend or girlfriend still has feelings for you, and he or she called to see exactly where you are regarding the breakup. Fixing your relationship from this point on can be easy, all because you didn’t chase after your ex when she dumped you.
Now, if you’re at the point where your ex hasn’t called you yet, Do not panic. There are some great techniques to make your ex miss you, be jealous of you, and want you back too. Getting your ex boyfriend or girlfriend into that mindset is as easy as pushing a few emotional buttons designed to replay some of the best parts of your relationship together. Learn these methods and you’ll be back in your ex’s arms in no time.